I woke up this
morning and I was feeling down in the dumps. I got up on the wrong side of the
bed however I am now up and running. I had a lot of work to do but I have
been belting it out. I can see a light at the end of the tunnel.
I am writing
here in idiom. There are hundreds of them and perhaps thousands. They exist in
every language and I like them a lot.
Idiom are
combinations of words that are figurative rather than literal. We all use them.
Idiom are most commonly referred to as 'figures of speech'. The term has Latin
origins and is derived from the word "idioma" which roughly
translates to a "special phrasing". Idiom have been
around for a long time. The plural of idiom is idiom. It is one of those
unusual words where the singular is the same as the multiple. There is no such
word as idioms. One idiom, two idiom, three idiom, four.
And so it
goes.
If you swap
the 'm' out of idiom for a 't' you get the word 'idiot'. An idiot is someone
who acts in a self defeating manner. They are mentally deficient and are
referred to as dolts or dullards. Both these words are excellent. The Latin
word idiota refers to an "ordinary person or layman". The
modern meaning and form of the term dates back to the Middle English period - circa
1300. It is a derivation of the Old French word idiote which is an
"uneducated or ignorant person". I think I know as many idiots as I
do idiom. Possibly more. My life is littered with them.
Particularly
the English.
An idiot is
said to be idiotic when they behave in a silly and uncouth manner. They suffer
from idiocy. Cretins, imbeciles and morons are all forms of idiots. A dunce is
a person who may also be deemed an idiot however they are also specifically
incapable of learning. A fool is not necessarily an idiot - they are simply
unwise. It is said that even death may not even cure an idiot. Methinks there
is a very fine line between audacity and idiocy and I suspect that I am
balanced precariously on this line.
I am
tottering.
Interestingly
- to me at least - are people who are referred to as "idiot savants'. This
term is somewhat passé though and is considered now to be politically
incorrect. Savant syndrome is a condition in which a person who has significant
mental disabilities demonstrates remarkable and often prodigious cognitive
abilities. Such abilities are way beyond what is considered normal. Many idiot
savants suffer severe autism. People with savant syndrome will typically score
very poorly on IQ tests but they demonstrate exceptional skills and brilliance
in very specific areas. These are often mathematically related and include
rapid or instant calculation and perfect recall.
It is a
fascinating phenomena.
The character
Raymond played by Dustin Hoffman in the film "Rain Man" was an idiot
savant. He was able to multiply very large numbers and count items just by
glancing at them however he couldn't tie his own shoelaces. Dustin Hoffman won
an Oscar for his performance in "Rain Man".
It was an
excellent film.
To 'kick the
bucket' is a very commonly uttered idiom and it means to die. There are many
versions of this idiom in other languages. Bulgarians say, 'to kick the bell'.
The French refer to dying as, 'eating dandelions by the root'. In Greece it is,
'to shake the horse shoes'. The crazy Dutch equivalent idiom is 'to lay the
piece of lead' and the even madder Danes say, "at stille
traeskoene" which
translates to 'take off the clogs'. I asked my deranged Danish neighbor Jens
whether he had used this term before and whether he owned a pair of clogs. He
snarled in response and called me a "stupid Australian fokker".
Nice one Jens.
You fat
obnoxious bastard.
I couldn't be
bothered trading insults with Jens today. I am a little fearful of him. I could
well have bombarded him with a whole series of idiom though but the cat got my
tongue and when push comes to shove I am all bark and no bite. This is a bit of
a crying shame but I have bigger fish to fry. Jens is somewhat of an emotional
cripple who thinks that he is the best thing since sliced bread. He is
not the sharpest knife in the drawer but his dangerous unpredictability also
makes taunting him like playing with fire. He could turn on me in a twinkling
of an eye.
Jens has hated
me since I spilt the beans to the management of the apartment complex in which
we live that he was the likely suspect who shat in the swimming pool that we
all share. I let the cat out of the bag. When he found out that I was the
informant he came at me like a bull out of the gate.
I feel like I
am living on borrowed time.
Writing in
idiom is easy. It is a piece of cake.
My sweet old
and dearly departed Nanna used idiom a lot. She used it right up until she
kicked the bucket. Her favorite was "that's a fine kettle of fish".
She said this whenever there was an awkward situation.
A predicament.
I
can't think of anymore idiom off the top off my head so I think I will call it
a day.
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